In recent years, there have been more and more books and articles arguing that we can use design principles, or ‘design thinking’, to generate a ‘plan’ for our lives. There are even university courses dedicated to this idea.
As educators, psychologists and social workers, this concept can sometimes feel a bit jarring. This may be because we work alongside people every day whose lives have been characterised, often through no fault of their own, by instability, uncertainty, trauma, socioeconomic disadvantage, illness, and a variety of life challenges that ‘design’ couldn’t have predicted or accounted for, so design-thinking may not feel possible or relevant.
It may even feel disrespectful or judgmental to engage with this approach, as the people we work with may feel like they have ‘failed’ because their life hasn’t progressed according to societal ideas about success.
And yet, if we pause for a moment, aren’t we all engaged in supporting the people we work with—whether they are children, young people, families, communities, or individuals—to come up with an empowering plan for their lives moving forward?
we are already using ‘design thinking’
As educators, we aim to set children and young people up for a meaningful and engaged life and career. We support them to develop social and emotional literacy so they can build relationships,
teach skills so they can find employment, and help them learn time management, emotional regulation, teamwork, adaptability, and how to learn new things. All of this is done so they can feel empowered to live a life that is meaningful and purposeful.
As social workers and psychologists, we often work alongside people working through significant life challenges. We help them navigate these challenges by supporting them—at least in part—to create a future picture that feels more hopeful, meaningful and connected. We then assist them to identify key steps or actions they could take towards making that future a reality. This process means that we are, at least in part, trying to assist them to reclaim ‘agency’ over aspects of their life.
So perhaps the question is not whether we are involved in life design, but how we do it, and what frameworks we use to guide this work.
You might find that some of the principles of design thinking look familiar—that’s because there is quite a lot of crossover with strength-based, solution-focused approaches.
what do we mean by ‘design your life’?
So, what is design thinking?
As Caryle Lauff, PhD in Design Theory and Methodology, explains, ‘Design thinking is an innovation management philosophy that has five core tenants to solving complex problems: empathise, define, ideate, prototype, and test.’
Empathise, in a human service context, might mean asking a person lots of curious questions about what’s important to them, what they value, what’s currently working for them and what they’d like to change, and how they connect, so you gain an understanding of their goals, beliefs and hopes. Define is about looking at what is working and what isn’t—what is the problem the person is trying to solve. Ideate is brainstorming lots of different ideas. Prototype is about creating a model or a ‘design’. Then test it out.
Rinse and repeat!
In practice, design thinking is a playful, iterative, action–reflection process rather than rigid linear process.
In his TED Talk How to Use Design Thinking to Create a Happier Life, Stanford professor and designer, Bill Burnett, describes design thinking as both a process and a mindset. He suggests that rather than starting with rigid goals, ‘design thinking says you should start with empathy and lean into what you’re curious about.’
should we be following our passions?
One of the most common assumptions about life design is that we should be ‘following our passion.’ However, Burnett argues that this belief is not supported by research.
‘…it turns out less than 20 percent of people have a single identifiable passion in their lives. It’s a dysfunctional belief. You don’t need a passion to start designing your life, and the reframe is “you are OK, just where you are.”’
This reframe is particularly important in educational and therapeutic contexts, where people may already feel overwhelmed, disenfranchised, or left behind by society. The idea that you must discover a single passion in order to live a meaningful life may feel deeply discouraging, when you are in survival mode.
Burnett also challenges the belief that it is ever ‘too late’ to make changes. He suggests that life is fluid and non-linear, and there is not one ‘best’ version of us waiting to be discovered. There are many possible lives we could live that are hopeful, meaningful, and connected.
His suggestion is to focus less on outcomes and more on process—to stay curious, to experiment, and to see life as something that unfolds over time.
life is unpredictable — so what is the point?
For many people who are just trying to get through the day, life can feel chaotic, unpredictable and constantly changing. Many of the most significant events in people’s lives are outside may feel outside their control.
So, what is the point of ‘designing your life’ in such an uncertain world?
Design thinking isn’t about creating a life plan that we ‘set and forget’. It is about inviting us to identify the things that are most meaningful and joyful in our lives, and increasing the likelihood we can experience more of those things.
It is about recognising and even embracing the fact that life is unpredictable, and setting up strategies and practices that allow us to find hope and meaning, even when things get tough.
One way we can do this, as Burnett points out, lies not in trying to control outcomes, but in identifying what is within our influence. While we cannot always control what happens around us, we do have some influence over what we focus on, how we interpret events, how we respond emotionally, and the actions we choose to take.
Design thinking, in this sense, becomes less about predicting the future and more about cultivating agency, flexibility, and responsiveness. It helps people notice choices, align actions with their values, and find meaning in small moments rather than waiting for a perfect future to arrive.
meaning versus happiness
Often people think that happiness and meaning are two sides of the same coin, that if we are happy, we must have meaning in our lives. But as humans, we are actually not very good at identifying the things that will actually make us happy.
Popular culture, for example, often suggests that happiness comes from winning the lottery, achieving individual success, receiving awards, going on expensive holidays, owning the right car or house, having an ‘Instagram-able’ relationship, or changing our appearance to align with current ideals of beauty. Research consistently shows that these factors have little lasting impact on wellbeing.
In fact, researchers have found that the pursuit of happiness can actually make us unhappy. In Psychology Today, article titled, ‘3 Beliefs About Happiness That Are Making People Unhappy’, author Susan Krauss Whitbourne argues:
‘Although positive psychology’s focus on happiness and wellbeing was a welcome change from so-called “negative” psychology’s emphasis on symptoms and disorders, this philosophical shift may have come at a cost. If happiness becomes the goal in and of itself, and you fail to reach that goal, there must be something wrong with you.’
People often focus their energy on chasing moments of happiness, yet these moments are unpredictable and fleeting. Many of us have had the experience of doing something we think we should enjoy, only to feel distracted, irritable, or emotionally flat.
Instead, if we ‘design’ our lives around identifying the things that bring us lasting joy or meaning, we are more likely to have a model that can endure the inevitable ups and downs of life. The famous long term study of happiness by Harvard University found that:
‘Close relationships, more than money or fame, are what keep people happy throughout their lives, the study revealed. Those ties protect people from life’s discontents, help to delay mental and physical decline, and are better predictors of long and happy lives than social class, IQ, or even genes. That finding proved true across the board among both the Harvard men and the inner-city participants.’
What is often more sustaining than happiness is a sense of meaning. Meaning is not about constant positive emotion, but about purpose, connection, and a sense that one’s life matters.
Moments of joy and meaning can be found in everyday experiences—sharing a joke, helping someone else, creating something, spending time in nature, or feeling absorbed in a task. These moments are often missed when life becomes dominated by ticking things off your ‘life plan to-do list’ rather than noticing moments of flow and connection.
reframing and perspective
Design thinking principles are particularly useful when people feel stuck. They offer a way to pause, reassess what matters, and experiment with small changes, rather than having to ‘fix’ everything that isn’t working for them. Burnett says that, as a designer:
‘I get stuck and unstuck and stuck and unstuck all the time.
‘One of the most important ways to get unstuck is reframing. It’s one of our most powerful mindsets. Reframing also makes sure that we’re working on the right problem. Life design involves a lot of reframes that allow you to step back, examine your biases and open up new solution spaces. Reframing is essential to finding the right problems and the right solutions.’
When people are immersed in challenges, they may be telling themselves a particular story about what’s happening—often these stories are characterised by self-blame, guilt, frustration and feeling of overwhelm. The problem or issue may feel all-encompassing and it can be difficult to gain perspective or notice anything positive.
In these contexts, inviting people to reframe or notice moments of joy or meaning beyond the situation must be done gently and respectfully, as future-focused thinking can feel unsafe or even impossible when basic needs are not met.
At the same time, sometimes giving people permission to imagine a future—however tentative—can be profoundly empowering. Techniques such as reframing, noticing strengths, and gently exploring values can help people move from a sense of being trapped to a sense of possibility.
As practitioners, we are not immune to life stressors and challenges. Educators, social workers and psychologists are often weighed down by funding requirements, curriculum demands, and bureaucratic processes that reinforce ‘to-do list’ thinking. This can make it difficult for us to step back, reflect, and reconnect with why we do this work in the first place.
When we get caught up in this type of thinking, it can be difficult to give the people we work alongside the time, space, and permission to take a step back and explore what makes life meaningful for them, where they find peace, connection and hope, and how they can invite these things into their lives more.
This is why it’s important we create the time and space for ourselves to step back from institutional or bureaucratic thinking, and bring some ‘design thinking’ into our own lives. Not only for the wellbeing of our students and clients, but also to enhance our own sense of wellbeing.
imagining a future
One way design thinking can be applied sensitively is through the development of a ‘picture of the future.’
This might involve using miracle questions like, ‘If you woke up tomorrow and everything was exactly how you’d like it to be, what would be different? What would you notice? What would other people notice about you?’
Or it might be taking people through a Five Column Process to enable them to start to build a hopeful plan for moving forward, focussing on where they are now, where they would like to be, what their strengths are, what’s getting in the way and what could help.
Rather than setting rigid goals, this approach encourages curiosity: If things were a little better, what might be different? What would you notice first?
This shift—from outcomes to direction, from certainty to exploration—can help people reconnect with hope without feeling pressured to have everything figured out.
in what ways can we ‘design our lives’?
When people are feeling stuck or considering change, design thinking principles can be applied in small, practical ways.
At its core is the recognition that while we cannot control everything, we do have choices—how we think, how we respond emotionally, how we interpret events, and what actions we take next. Even small choices can accumulate over time.
Reframing by questioning the stories we tell ourselves and examining where they came from is a powerful part of this process. Asking questions such as—Is this belief true? How do I know? Who taught me this? What alternative story might be more helpful?—can open up new possibilities.
Design thinking also encourages experimentation. Rather than making dramatic changes, people can ‘try things on.’ Talking to someone who works in an area of interest, sitting in on a class, shadowing someone for a day, watching videos, reading, or volunteering can provide valuable information without the pressure to commit or perform.
Another useful practice is noticing what already brings meaning, joy, hope, or awe. Over the course of a week, people can record moments—large or small—that feel nourishing. Once these patterns are visible, it becomes easier to intentionally create more space for them.
Clarifying values is also central. Using tools such as the ‘5 whys’ can help people move beyond surface goals to understand what truly motivates them. Values provide a stable anchor when people’s circumstances are unstable or uncertain.
Finally, identifying strengths can help restore perspective. Noticing what we are good at, what others appreciate about us, and what helps us feel engaged and connected can counteract the deficit-focused narratives many people carry.
limitations and ethical considerations
While design thinking offers useful tools, it is not a solution to systemic inequality, trauma, or mental illness. There is a risk of individualising problems that are structural in nature or implying a level of control that people simply do not have.
Design thinking must therefore be applied with care, humility, and consent.
Used well, design thinking is not about fixing people or forcing optimism. It is a flexible framework that can support reflection, agency, and meaning—when, and only when, people are ready.
one final thought …
Perhaps the most helpful way to think about ‘designing your life’ in human services contexts is not about creating a master plan, but instead, cultivating curiosity, compassion, and responsiveness—for ourselves and for the people we support.
Design thinking, at its best, reminds us that lives are not problems to be solved, but stories that continue to unfold.
By Sue King-Smith
